


Five Times Chloe O'Brian Thought About Jack Bauer

by Mack_the_Spoon



Category: 24 (TV)
Genre: 24: Live Another Day, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-05-09
Updated: 2014-05-09
Packaged: 2018-01-24 03:17:05
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,033
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1589690
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Mack_the_Spoon/pseuds/Mack_the_Spoon
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The evolution of Chloe.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Five Times Chloe O'Brian Thought About Jack Bauer

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks to Namarie for the beta.
> 
> I can't be the only one dying to know how Chloe got to this place, can I? (Spoilers for the whole show and up to Chloe's first appearance in 24: LAD.)

~~~~~~

One

This was it. It was really happening. She had done the unforgivable, and there was no last-minute reprieve coming this time. Prison. Her logical mind couldn't help but step in to clarify that the next stage was most likely some kind of FBI holding cell. She had to be sentenced before actually going to prison.

But she would go. Chloe knew this for certain. And despite her brave words before they took her away, the thought of her son not knowing her, or only knowing her as a criminal, a convict, shook her to her core. This was not how it was supposed to go. She was supposed to do what she knew was right – what anyone with a brain would know was right – and everything was supposed to be okay.

She tried to stay calm. She tried to remember that Jack was free, at least. But it wasn't too helpful, when she remembered that he, too, wouldn't be seeing his family anymore. For him, that was in all likelihood a life sentence. At first, that horrible thought made her feel much worse. And then she told herself that if he could face it, so could she. But Chloe had never been very good at lying – least of all to herself.

~~~~~~

Two

Chloe found herself almost dreading tomorrow. Tomorrow she was finally getting out. It should have been a cause for joy, or at least unmitigated relief. And she did want to get out. Of course she did. But at least after the hellish adjustment period, in prison things had mostly been predictable. She'd always known what she would be doing, always known what she'd be facing.

Outside was an unknown entity at this point. She already knew just how little her family had remained frozen in time waiting for her. That was frightening enough, wondering how she could possibly fit back in. And that was without even mentioning the job situation. Even if there had been the faintest chance that she could get a job like the one she'd had – a laughable idea – Chloe had long since decided that it would never been an option. Any remaining faith in her own government had drained away as she sat in prison with nothing else to think about but how she'd ended up there. That righteous anger had been the only thing that had gotten her this far.

It had been hardly surprising that a U.S. federal penitentiary would contain others with similar grudges. Some of her fellow inmates, she discovered early on, knew who she was, knew her skill set, and why she was there. Some of those people had strong opinions on the matter. It had taken only eleven days before Chloe received her first discreetly passed-on offer to join a group of hacker dissidents. She had refused automatically, but the idea wouldn't be put out of her mind. The fact that she had gotten similar offers on a semi-regular basis throughout the duration of her sentence didn't help matters.

The part of her that clung stubbornly on to her old life had thus far won out, and she had continued to reject all such offers. What kind of person would it make her to join up with those kind of people after a whole life of being on the other side? On the other hand, it would be hypocritical to pretend she still believed all that.

She pretended it didn't matter what Jack would think if he knew she was considering this. Sometimes, if you pretend long enough, it becomes real – or at least a close approximation of reality.

~~~~~~

Three

In some ways, it was surprisingly easy to get used to her new work. It was in a totally new place, of course. And everything looked different. Even she looked different now. But what she was actually doing on a day-to-day basis could be a lot like her old life: hacking, retrieving information and passing it on – she even repositioned satellites from time to time.

She wasn't going home every day to her husband and son. There was no getting around that. Apart from Adrian, too, her colleagues all seemed younger than her. Kids. She wondered what had driven them to join up. In her angrier moments, she doubted that they could possibly have the depth of motivation that she had. Either way, at least the difference in age meant she got respect. No one chewed her out for her bluntness.

The biggest difference was the hardest to ignore: Jack. He had been out of her life for years now. Surely she was better off without him, considering where her loyalty to him had landed her. Yet she still sometimes expected to see him at work. The ridiculousness of it infuriated her, but there it was.

~~~~~~

Four

It wasn't uncommon for his name to come up in their work. It was no surprise, considering the enormous impact he'd had on the intelligence community. Still, she always caught her breath whenever it happened. Usually it was old news – just a mention of his involvement in stopping a terrorist plot back in the CTU days, or sometimes speculation about where he was now. Very occasionally, though, the mention was a report that Jack Bauer had been sighted somewhere. Mali. Bulgaria. Panama. Cambodia. Sometimes it was obviously nonsense, but on a few occasions it looked like a credible lead.

On those occasions, when Chloe left work at night, she lay in bed and didn't close her eyes for the entire night. But the news she dreaded never came. If any of her colleagues ever connected her increased tension and then relief with these alerts, they knew better than to bring it up.

~~~~~~

Five

Two simultaneous, contradictory thoughts continued to buzz around in her brain when it wasn't blank from the white-hot agony of the drugs they were giving her:

Jack used to do this, he was infamous for this, he still is, how could he, how could I have ever been okay with this?

and

If anyone could, Jack could break in here, stop it, he's not coming, why would he, he doesn't know and he doesn't care, oh God please, Jack.


End file.
